Colorado Springs, CO – An adventuresome German shepherd named Rex found himself in deep poo after chasing after a squirrel, or bunny, or leaf, or some other random, enticing “thing” in Colorado Springs. The Humane Society of the Pikes Peak Region recounted Rex’s stinky adventure in a humorous Facebook post this week, explaining how the curious pooch got himself into a crazy predicament.
The post begins:
Hi! My name’s Rex, and you’re probably wondering how I got here…
See, it all started with a bunny. Or maybe it was a squirrel. Or possibly a leaf doing an extremely convincing impression of a bunny riding a squirrel. Whatever it was, it was very fast and extremely chaseable. One minute I was in my yard, sniffing things of great importance, and the next, I was in a strange new land, one filled with big lakes that smelled… funky.
Rex followed his nose into an “interesting” lake, plunging in without hesitation and swimming towards a tunnel on the opposite side. The animal welfare agency writes:
That’s when I saw it. A shiny metal tunnel at the edge of the weird lake. It looked mysterious. Magical. Possibly full of fish. Or cheese. Or fish with cheese. Naturally, I crawled right in. That… was my first mistake.
Because the tunnel? It didn’t lead to cheese. It led to a cliff. A very tall drop-off. Like, at least 100 tennis balls high. Maybe 150 if you stack them carefully. I peered over the edge and immediately thought, “Oh no. Nope. Nooope. I am not a cat. I do not land on my feet. I land on my face. Or my majestic behind. Or both.”
Rex did his utmost to wiggle his way out of the tunnel, but his reverse was not as effective as his forward drive. Hopelessly stuck, Rex whined and cried until some skilled humans appeared to save the day. The agency described the moment the animal control officer arrived, writing:
She looked into the pipe and blinked a few times, like she was trying to make sure I wasn’t a swamp hallucination. I wiggled my head and barked to make sure she knew I was real, and she said, “We’re gonna get you out, buddy, but I’m gonna need some help.”
The big guns were needed to fix Rex’s predicament. Enter…the fire department. The shelter said:
A big red fire truck arrived, lights flashing, full of heroes. Firefighters jumped out, looked at the scene, and made the exact same face you make when your burrito falls apart halfway through eating it. But they didn’t give up on me. They brought out a GIANT bucket on a giant arm. Next thing I knew, I was being scooped up like a very dirty, mildly confused prize from a claw machine. I was lifted into the air like royalty (royalty who smelled like a garbage can during a heatwave), and slowly lowered to safety.
Once I was on solid ground again, the officer checked my collar and gave someone a call. I did my best to thank every firefighter with kisses and wildly uncoordinated tail slaps.
Once Rex was safe and sound, the stinky part of the rescue took place – it turns out that the “lake” Rex swam through was sewage.
It took a hazmat suit and a lot of soap and water to wash the stink off of good boy Rex.
And all is well that ends well – Rex’s relieved Dad showed up to reunite with his stinky little adventurer. The shelter thanked those involved in Rex’s rescue, writing:
Thank you, Officer Mauerman (even though you betrayed me with a bath), and thank you to the amazing crew at South Metro Fire Rescue for rescuing this very goofy, very curious, very stuck pup. I may be a little ridiculous, but thanks to you, I’m safe, I’m clean, and I’m home. And I definitely learned my lesson! No more swimming in smelly mystery lakes, pinky paw promise. 🐾
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